Subtle but persistent, these workplace phrases chip away at women’s credibility and reinforce the very biases companies claim to be dismantling.
You’ve probably been there: a meeting is buzzing with ideas, and a woman offers a solid suggestion, only to have a male colleague repeat it moments later and get all the credit. Or maybe it’s that well-meaning but totally condescending phrase that’s supposed to be a compliment but makes you cringe. These moments, often subtle and unintentional, erode morale and can make the workplace feel unwelcoming.
The phrases are so common that they’ve almost become part of the office life, but they carry baggage. They signal a deeper bias, a presumption that women are more emotional, less assertive, or simply not as serious about their careers as their male counterparts.
Smile More
This phrase epitomizes microaggressions. It tells a woman that her default expression, her natural state, is not good enough. It implies she’s there to be pleasing and agreeable, not to be a serious professional. The request isn’t about her mood; it’s about making others feel comfortable. Women are not props in the workplace, and their expressions should not be policed.
You’re So Emotional
This one is a classic. A woman expresses frustration or passion about a project, and someone dismisses it as her being “too emotional.” It’s a phrase that shuts down communication and minimizes her feelings. The truth is, expressing emotions at your workplace isn’t a flaw; it’s a sign of commitment, and it’s a trait men are often praised for.
Are You Going To Have Kids?
This question, often asked during an interview or early in a woman’s career, is a major red flag. It’s an invasion of privacy and a loaded question that wouldn’t typically be posed to a man. It suggests a woman should always prioritize having kids over having a career, creating an immediate and unfair bias. It’s a presumption that a woman’s biological clock is more important than her professional ambition.
It’s Because You’re A Woman
This phrase is often used to explain a woman’s success or failure, completely ignoring her skills, effort, and intelligence. It can be a backhanded compliment or an excuse, but either way, it diminishes her. It reduces her identity to her gender, stripping her of her individuality and her professional identity. Her accomplishments should be hers alone, based on her merit, not her gender.
You’re Being A Little Aggressive
A man who is direct and assertive is often seen as a “leader,” but a woman with the same traits can be labeled “aggressive.” This “double bind bias” is a real barrier to advancement. Women who speak their minds and advocate for their ideas are often penalized for it. Women may feel they have to prove themselves more than their male colleagues. That’s unfair.
It Must Be Hard To Balance Everything
This comment is often said with good intentions, but it’s still rooted in a stereotype. It assumes that a woman is the primary caregiver and that her work life is a constant battle against her home life. While many women do balance a lot, this comment can feel patronizing, as if their work is a side hustle and their real job is at home. Many men also balance family and work, but they rarely get this comment.
Did You Get That Right?
A woman presents a data-heavy report or a complex plan, and a male colleague immediately questions its accuracy with a skeptical tone. While questions are part of the process, this specific phrasing, often directed at women, feels like a challenge to her competence. According to a Fortune report, high-performing women (76%) receive more negative feedback than men (2%), suggesting a bias in how women’s work is evaluated.
We Need A Woman’s Perspective
This phrase can feel like being put on a pedestal and a stereotype simultaneously. It suggests a woman’s value is in providing a “female lens” rather than her unique professional insights. It tokenizes her, making her the official representative for all women. Her perspective is valuable because of her experience and skills, not because of her gender.
You Look So Pretty Today
While this may seem like a simple compliment, it can make a woman feel like her appearance is more important than her professional capabilities. It’s a comment that shifts the focus from her work to her looks, and it can be especially frustrating when it comes from a senior colleague. Workplaces should be places of professional respect, not beauty pageants.
You’re Just So Good With People
This is a subtle dig that can be a way of pushing women toward roles considered “softer” or more service-oriented, such as HR or administrative support. It pigeonholes women and ignores their analytical, strategic, or technical skills. It’s a way of saying, “You’re good at the soft stuff, so let the men handle the tough stuff.” Women hold only 26.7% of all tech jobs. This can be partly because of the subtle encouragement of women toward non-technical roles.
Disclaimer – This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information. It is not intended to be professional advice.
How Total Beginners Are Building Wealth Fast in 2025—No Experience Needed
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I used to think investing was something you did after you were already rich. Like, you needed $10,000 in a suit pocket and a guy named Chad at some fancy firm who knew how to “diversify your portfolio.” Meanwhile, I was just trying to figure out how to stretch $43 to payday.
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We all click on them with the hope that just THIS time the secret to changing a bad habit or adopting a healthy one will be revealed and we’ll finally be able to stick to that diet, stop that one or ten things that might in the moment make us feel temporarily good but really just make us fat, unhealthy, sad, mad or just frustrated with ourselves.
