Have you ever walked by a coworker’s desk and wondered how they manage to look so busy, even though you know they haven’t actually done any work? You’re not imagining things. Our Best sense is worldwide, just 23% of employees are engaged at work, according to research from Gallup’s State of the Global Workplace.
Nearly 8 out of 10 people around you might be coasting through their day. The incredible statistic translates to $8.8 trillion in lost productivity globally, enough money to buy every NFL team more than 30 times over.
The crazy part? Unfortunately, the majority of managers cannot even detect these as productivity vampires until it’s too late.
They perfected the art of looking busy
To these employees, productivity is just a race akin to the Olympics. They file papers, click through internet browser tabs when you walk near, and always look like they are entering something crucial. The evidence from Thrive Global suggests that the average knowledge worker uses communications tools alone to check in every 6 minutes.
They will take 30 minutes to write a two-sentence email simply as an excuse not to begin any real work. Or rearranging their desk for the third time this week, or all of a sudden becoming interested in office supplies. The telltale sign? So ask them what they work on, and hear their vague answer is garbled.
Procrastination is their superpower
These people would write a PhD thesis on why today is not the day to start their project after all., They will spend an hour researching the best spreadsheet formatting before even considering worksheet tabs.
All projects involve endless prep, false starts, and require multiple apps to supposedly “optimize your workflow.” They are always a day from the beginning, waiting for the right time to be just right. They will ask for extensions or turn in a 30-minute piece.
Their calendar is swamped with meeting addiction
No, meetings should not be like cocktails and social hour at the country club. Executives spend 23 hours per week in meetings, according to Harvard Business Review, so nonproductive employees are getting paid for even more meetings without doing anything. They sign up for all the committees, attend optional brainstorms, and somehow manage to have a “quick sync” when real work needs to get done.
They sit quietly in these meetings, or they ask questions that were already addressed five minutes ago. They have realized that being in a conference room allows them to avoid making decisions at no cost.
Sick days happen every other tuesday
On some, certain mysterious afflictions only attacked on Mondays or Fridays…or the day before a huge presentation. They always have a different excuse: food poisoning, a migraine, car trouble, or the go-to: ‘family emergency.
These are also the same people who seem to make it to happy hours and office parties! This makes everyone else do more work. They come back as if nothing had happened and try to jump right into the workflow.
Innovation allergies run deep
They’ll look at you in awe if you ask them for a creative solution to this point. According to Deloitte’s Enterprise Growth & Innovation, 94% of executives agree that innovation is key to company growth. Still, some workers seem hell-bent on disproving the truth.
They meet every new idea with a logical explanation for why it won’t work. Whether they outright resist new software or simply groan about updated processes, they often have similar reactions.
Their favourite sport is the blame game
It is never either of their faults, just ask them. This may cause these employees to avoid getting their shadow crooked, as someone else would be forced to take the blame for it. You say accountability, we say hello, slow-moving bus of road kill colleagues.
Technical difficulties or a vague scope story, there’s always something other than themselves that prevents them from success. It is evidently against their personal constitution for them to admit fault.
Also on MSN: 13 types of bosses that drive employees crazy
Time management skills went missing
The way I often see these folks balance their calendar is by attempting to juggle flaming torches on a unicycle. Although this may be surprising, 18% of people have a time management system in place, according to Acuity Training’s research, and pride kicks in as chaos arrives for unproductive employees.
Deadlines on the calendar for weeks still manage to surprise them every time. Their desk is a paper disaster site, and they spend more time searching than doing.
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Quiet quitting became their full-time job
These employees have mastered the art of working to rule and not one inch beyond. Gallup,finds roughly 18% of U.S. employees are actively disengaged, which is a distinct category from those who might be described as “quiet quitting”.
Show up right on time, leaving just as the minute hand hits 5 p.m., and they never answer emails after hours, even in emergency situations. They know their duties and will pull out the job description to let you know if a request falls outside of that.
Micromanagement comes naturally
Other employees prefer to show they are doing something, even if it’s not the right way. They’ll spend hours checking on tasks that could be completed in minutes if left alone. They require constant updates, detailed explanations for straightforward decisions, and approval for processes that should be automated.
Their need for control comes from their own lack of belief in productivity. Bottlenecks appear in workflows that require unnecessary control.
Recognition hunger never gets satisfied
Because these employees act like they’re the first person to ever appear at work.They believe they deserve thanks for doing their job and get upset that no one recognizes their “great” work as an employee. Research from the Harvard Business Review states that employee recognition has a significant effect on performance and engagement.
The air they are breathing is the only thing that I can see them being entitled to an award for. They seem to take credit for the team’s success, but they don’t care if it all falls apart quickly, leaving no concern for those behind the scenes.
Burnout becomes a badge of honor
Exhaustion is a status symbol. While the World Health Organisation speaks of burnout as an occupational phenomenon, other employees misuse the term to explain away their underperformance.
They are tired, stressed, and overworked, yet they produce less than their counterparts. They will complain about how much work it is, all while spending half the day on personal phone calls. Actual burnout is real, but these use the symptoms as a cover for their lack of output.
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Key takeaways
Identifying lazy employees is not about catching people on a bad day – after all, we’re only human. The red flags appear when these events become regular practices, which cripple team performance and morale. Wise managers recognize these red flags early and respond with clear expectations, appropriate support, or performance improvement strategies. Faced with the loss in productivity, companies are learning their lessons; those that address low productivity create better workspaces for everyone and avoid millions in lost efficiency costs.
Disclaimer – This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information. It is not intended to be professional advice.
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